Fish fucks whale
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Background
The events that transpire below occurred AFTER the New England Meet 2006. This article assumes you are familiar with the basics of that meet event. The important things to note are that both The Dopefish and Sassafrass were present.
Actually, the meet was hardly involved whatsoever. Dope and Sass hardly even spoke to each other at the meet.
Elaborate if at all possible, please. --ColonelSkills 13:12, 29 Jun 2006 (PDT)
DISCOVERY
So here's how it goes down. Some guy named Cherrypop from Dopefish's old board, BeyondUnreal, appears and posts this (http://www.gamingforce.com/forums/community-commons/8350-internet-friendships-post181336.html), which is basically a link to this (http://forums.beyondunreal.com/showthread.php?t=174973). So Capo goes and makes a pimpworthy thread (http://www.gamingforce.com/forums/sewers/8379-sass-fucked-dopey-whoduthunkit.html) about it.
BUT IS THIS MERELY A JOKE?
Much lol is had at this thought! Is it real? Is it an elaborate joke set up by Fish to prove to his Unreal buddies that he's not a total tool? At first, no one knows! That is, however, until...
HARASSMENT
Colonel Skills and various other members, after reading about the hilarity that is this incident in #gfchat, decides to phone Sass and leave her various voicemails. The third voicemail seems to make Sass angry, and she goes and creates a journal entry (http://www.gamingforce.com/forums/journal.php?action=view&amount=single&userid=24&entryid=7064) about it. In the comments section (http://www.gamingforce.com/forums/journal.php?action=comment&entryid=7064) there is much poking and prodding at Sass from various members. She is clearly aggravated by these shenanigans, especially when she has to work in the morning and no one will leave her the fuck alone at 3am. Naturally one would assume that after the 3rd call she would have turned off the phone but sometimes drama just tastes better when you're angry. To a certain extent even this was seen as a rather immature thing by some members including Encephalon who, even though is not well-liked by Sass, decided to make a journal entry (http://www.gamingforce.com/forums/journal.php?action=view&amount=single&userid=175&entryid=7129) expressing his annoyance with the circus created by the attention monguering that took place over this. As usual, nobody cared about this entry and the cattle prodding continued.
But Wait!
What's THIS (http://www.gamingforce.com/forums/journal.php?action=view&amount=single&userid=42&entryid=6972) though? A journal entry by Dopefish about Hickeys? Well, SHIT. Let us POKE AND PROD some more via the comment page (http://www.gamingforce.com/forums/journal.php?action=comment&entryid=6972). And oh SHIT, it comes to light that it Is TRUE. (Read all the comments.)
OSHI
Yeah, that's what I said too. But LO. Pang also knows about it! This adds to the factor of hilarity by at least a factor of 1.2. However, at this point Capo goes to that BeyondUnreal forum place and post pictures of Sassafrass. Shortly after he takes down the pics, but they are up long enough to cause some lol from various members of that forum. There is an archived version of that thread with Sass's pics included here (http://colonelskills.belkanairforce.com/forums/GFFArchive/LEGENDARYTHREADS/Wanna%20See%20Who%20Dopey-boy%20Got%20Nailed%20By%20%20-%20BeyondUnreal%20Forums.htm).
Quotes
"I am impressed by one thing: if this is all true, then Dopefish must have a pretty big cock. I mean, to legitimately call it sex would mean there was some insertion and, well, most skinny white boys just don't pack enough of a harpoon to spear the Great White Sassafrass." -- Crash Landon
[16:16] <+Hito> How old is Sass?
[16:18] <+Benjamin> like 25
[16:18] <@Colonel_Skills> Sass has no age. Like other celestial objects of her magnitude, determining the exact age is difficult at best. We have no probes which can accurately return a soil sample for aging tests either. However, the recently developed DOPEFISH MARK VIII has been rumoured to be able to penetrate it.
Links
Archived Look Who Dopey Had Sex With thread from the Unreal Forum (http://colonelskills.belkanairforce.com/forums/GFFArchive/LEGENDARYTHREADS/Wanna%20See%20Who%20Dopey-boy%20Got%20Nailed%20By%20%20-%20BeyondUnreal%20Forums.htm)
Archived Unreal Forum thread in which Dopefish talks about fucking Sass (http://colonelskills.belkanairforce.com/forums/GFFArchive/LEGENDARYTHREADS/Leave%20BuF,%20and%20you%20too%20can%20get%20laid!%20-%20BeyondUnreal%20Forums.htm).
